I cannot stand Jack Nicholson. I don't care how many Oscars he's won. I don't care that he's one of the living legends of Hollywood. I don't care that he was in the Best Picture winner this year or any other year.

The man is smarmy. He's a self-involved egotist who mugs shamelessly every time the camera cuts to him (and they do it once every half-hour or something). He thinks he's terribly interesting, and the Oscar people feed that notion every damn year.

He's given some good performances, I'll grant you, but he's not the King of Hollywood. He's a sad little man on a sad little hill, giving grandiose performances and frequently relying on the stock "Jack" character to get him through the day.

This rant brought to you by the Oscars, now with more Al Gore.